The holidays are here and it is so much fun to give our children everything they want. We need to ask ourselves are we doing it for them or are we doing it out of guilt, creating happiness in a year that has been exceptionally difficult for all of us, or make us feel better based on our own childhood history? To be honest this year is the last year we need to talk about spoiling our children and why we shouldn't, Heck, we ALL need to feel better and if giving our children everything they want this year will make us happy and our children happy who's to say not to do it.
I say go for it! Spoil the heck out of children this year. Why not? But, and there is always a but make sure you explain that this is a very special month and year. That next month it all goes back to normal. 2020 has been stressful (thank goodness it was a leap year so we could have an extra day), and the holidays are a perfect time to put our worries away and cheerfully say goodbye to the year and if that means spoiling not only our children but ourselves then let's do it! Of course I'm trying to find links to back me up but, believe it or not, I could only find one: The Benefits of Spoiling Kids in America in the Huffington Post. It's a pretty good read but it seemed a bit convoluted .
Though I am not a professional child therapist, psychologist, or really anyone that should be relied on for advice I'm giving you permission to spoil your kids this year.
Steps to spoiling your kids for Holidays 2020:
- Say YES as much as you can. Yes to junk food, to chocolate, and playing games all day. Yes to sleepovers, taking the car for a spin with friends, tasting coffee or other adult beverages. Just say YES!
- Make sure you give your children lots and lots of love with hugs, smiles, compliments,
- Let them have a longer holiday break then normal. Let them take breaks from remote learning as a surprise.
- Don't make them responsible for anything. If it makes you feel good give the kids the month off of cleaning their room, feeding the pets, walking the dog, doing their homework, flushing the toilet (ewe!), taking showers or bathing, brushing their teeth or any kind of hygiene.
- Let them watch as much television as they want. This month is the month to put caution to the wind.
- Get them everything they want. If you can afford it do it. Bikes for everyone, expensive lego sets let it be so, every nerf gun under the sun can be theirs, pets, horses, all of it just let them have it.
Just remember a month of spoiling can lead to a future of temper tantrums, You may experience defiance for 2021 and more dependency on you, the parent, to take care of their every need.
When you notice a change in your child's behavior after you spend an entire month of spoiling them and giving in to their every whim get prepared for some blow-back. Then ask yourself; what if I've been doing a portion of this for their whole life what kind of adult am I raising? If you get a lot of bad behavior after only one month of spoiling your child can you imagine the grief you'll get if you begin to cut back on what you physically give to your children and substitute the monetary gifts with emotional gifts of encouragement, positive re-inforcement, spending time with them doing things that you both enjoy?
So go ahead, spoil the kids this year for the holidays. Says yes to the spoil and quit worrying about it. That alone, will take some of the stress away from you It may even save you money because you can casual your massage.